This has always been my blog for contemplating and sharing my personal life, thoughts, and questions, and it will continue to be that; thanks for being here with me. I have a separate blog now for times when I want to write about my thoughts on a scriptural passage or other studies like that. If you are interested, you can find it here:
http://cecilandmeridith.blogspot.com/
The first 6 posts were an assignment on Genesis 3:1-7. Nevertheless, they should be interesting.
So here I am. The only thing left for college is an internship and one 3 credit course that I will take at the same time. I guess I'm all grown up now. It feels a little strange. I'm a little anxious because I don't know what I'm going to do with my life yet, but I have a new peace about that. I am more relaxed now than I can ever remember. There's nothing hanging over my head. It's wonderful.
I feel very blessed right now.
Saturday, May 7, 2011
Friday, April 22, 2011
A Different Approach
I would like to make an amendment to my previous post. I'm not disagreeing with anything I said then; I would just like to add to it.
I've spent a considerable amount of time seeking the Lord's will for my life; earnestly seeking what He would have me do, where He would have me go, and how He would have me do it.
I'm changing my approach. I don't care about these things. I desire to know God more. That's all that matters to me. God, reveal yourself more to me everyday.
It seems so obvious now. As I grow in my relationship with Christ, His will for my life will become clear. In the meantime, as a wise friend told me, "just keep doing the last thing God told you to do until you're sure that he's told you to do something else."
I can do that. So much stress just left my life.
-Nate
I've spent a considerable amount of time seeking the Lord's will for my life; earnestly seeking what He would have me do, where He would have me go, and how He would have me do it.
I'm changing my approach. I don't care about these things. I desire to know God more. That's all that matters to me. God, reveal yourself more to me everyday.
It seems so obvious now. As I grow in my relationship with Christ, His will for my life will become clear. In the meantime, as a wise friend told me, "just keep doing the last thing God told you to do until you're sure that he's told you to do something else."
I can do that. So much stress just left my life.
-Nate
Tuesday, April 19, 2011
Decisions
It's late, but that's when my brain tends to think deeper.
I had been fasting and praying, which concluded at the prayer gathering at the Deltaplex Saturday night. The purpose was two-fold. The secondary purpose was to seek the Lord's will in my up-coming major life decisions. I had a small list of options of what I could do after my internship is over this summer. The small list rapidly became a long list.
I was earnestly asking the Lord to make it clear which option would be best. Because I honestly want His will for my life. In other words, I was hoping He would narrow it down to one somehow.
The Lord taught me something in those days. I think that God delights in letting us decide. If the option will bring glory to God, our motives are pure, and the door is open, then it's within God's will. I think we tend to make these decisions harder than they need to be. I simply need to examine my motives in each option to make sure they are pure, and then pursue the option I want most. If God does not want me there, I trust that he will close the door.
Full time ministry, ready or not, here I come.
I had been fasting and praying, which concluded at the prayer gathering at the Deltaplex Saturday night. The purpose was two-fold. The secondary purpose was to seek the Lord's will in my up-coming major life decisions. I had a small list of options of what I could do after my internship is over this summer. The small list rapidly became a long list.
I was earnestly asking the Lord to make it clear which option would be best. Because I honestly want His will for my life. In other words, I was hoping He would narrow it down to one somehow.
The Lord taught me something in those days. I think that God delights in letting us decide. If the option will bring glory to God, our motives are pure, and the door is open, then it's within God's will. I think we tend to make these decisions harder than they need to be. I simply need to examine my motives in each option to make sure they are pure, and then pursue the option I want most. If God does not want me there, I trust that he will close the door.
Full time ministry, ready or not, here I come.
Tuesday, April 5, 2011
Priorities... keeping them straight.
A long time ago, at the beginning of the fall semester, I listed my priorities. I set up a basic order of priorities in my life that, when push came to shove, would decide what would ultimately demand my time. I knew, going into a school year of 40 credits, that I would encounter days where I would not be able to do everything I wanted to do.
Interestingly, school work found itself at #3 on the list. So far, by God's grace, I had managed to accomplish the first 2 and still have enough time to finish all my school work. This week it didn't happen. Priorities 1 and 2 left school work in the dust. I still got some of it done, just not all of it.
I'm at peace with how this went down. I am proud that I kept my priorities as I had wanted them. I had a great weekend with Tyler and Alex. God continues to bless my socks off.
Keep running the race.
Interestingly, school work found itself at #3 on the list. So far, by God's grace, I had managed to accomplish the first 2 and still have enough time to finish all my school work. This week it didn't happen. Priorities 1 and 2 left school work in the dust. I still got some of it done, just not all of it.
I'm at peace with how this went down. I am proud that I kept my priorities as I had wanted them. I had a great weekend with Tyler and Alex. God continues to bless my socks off.
Keep running the race.
Friday, March 4, 2011
Amendments and Prayers
I must amend my previous post with a few clarifications. I still stand by what I said, but I can understand how things can be taken wrongly.
- If you were unsure that I was speaking about you, then I wasn't. I can say this because those whom I referred to have been spoken to regarding this.
- If you think I'm being hypocritical, it's because I am a hypocrite. So it is perfectly understandable that you would come to this conclusion.
- Am I a cynic regarding cynical people? Unfortunately yes, from time to time. But it is a cycle I am trying to break myself from.
- When I say that I am avoiding these people, it is not meant to be taken that I am giving up on them or our relationship. I love my brothers and sisters in Christ. I pray for them. Rather, I would liken this to a pastor who needs a sabbatical. He is not giving up on his people. He simply needs a break from them to regroup, re-energize, and return. In my struggle to become less cynical I must temporarily distance myself from people who negatively influence me in this area. However, the emphasis is on temporary.
Thanks for bearing with me on this.
..................................................
If you haven't noticed, I am right in the middle of the craziest, most chaotic part of my life thus far. I am half-way through my final traditional semester, followed by an early summer internship. The workload is tremendous. I live from week to week for deadlines. There is just no other option. If I had a major project due in 2 weeks, I wouldn't even begin to think about it for at least another week.
I say this all to say that God has used this season of my life to bring about massive change in me. He is still working on me, and I've got a long way to go, but when I look back at who I was, I don't even recognize myself. For this I am incredibly thankful.
I covet your prayers for my near future. I am hardly concerned about where I'll be 5 years from now, because it is difficult to see past the giant standing in front of me; that is, the next 4 months. I am not praying for a smooth ride or for less chaos. Rather, I am praying that God continues to use the chaos in front of me for His glory and His sanctifying work in my life.
As chaotic as these months are, I will soon need to make important decisions regarding my future. So please also pray that I will have a clear mind, amid the chaos, to make Spirit led decisions that will effect the course of my life. His will is greater than my will; His wisdom is greater than my wisdom.
Grace and Peace
- If you were unsure that I was speaking about you, then I wasn't. I can say this because those whom I referred to have been spoken to regarding this.
- If you think I'm being hypocritical, it's because I am a hypocrite. So it is perfectly understandable that you would come to this conclusion.
- Am I a cynic regarding cynical people? Unfortunately yes, from time to time. But it is a cycle I am trying to break myself from.
- When I say that I am avoiding these people, it is not meant to be taken that I am giving up on them or our relationship. I love my brothers and sisters in Christ. I pray for them. Rather, I would liken this to a pastor who needs a sabbatical. He is not giving up on his people. He simply needs a break from them to regroup, re-energize, and return. In my struggle to become less cynical I must temporarily distance myself from people who negatively influence me in this area. However, the emphasis is on temporary.
Thanks for bearing with me on this.
..................................................
If you haven't noticed, I am right in the middle of the craziest, most chaotic part of my life thus far. I am half-way through my final traditional semester, followed by an early summer internship. The workload is tremendous. I live from week to week for deadlines. There is just no other option. If I had a major project due in 2 weeks, I wouldn't even begin to think about it for at least another week.
I say this all to say that God has used this season of my life to bring about massive change in me. He is still working on me, and I've got a long way to go, but when I look back at who I was, I don't even recognize myself. For this I am incredibly thankful.
I covet your prayers for my near future. I am hardly concerned about where I'll be 5 years from now, because it is difficult to see past the giant standing in front of me; that is, the next 4 months. I am not praying for a smooth ride or for less chaos. Rather, I am praying that God continues to use the chaos in front of me for His glory and His sanctifying work in my life.
As chaotic as these months are, I will soon need to make important decisions regarding my future. So please also pray that I will have a clear mind, amid the chaos, to make Spirit led decisions that will effect the course of my life. His will is greater than my will; His wisdom is greater than my wisdom.
Grace and Peace
Sunday, February 27, 2011
Worn out by Christians
I'm worn out. I'm not talking about physically, though I am tired. I'm not talking about school work, though it is a burden. I'm talking about negativity. I wrote about this before, but this time there is change.
I've identified the issue that has the most effect on my attitude. The cynicism around me. Sometimes I feel on top of the world, filled with the Spirit, motivated to press on for Jesus and love everyone I come in contact with. Then the cynic walks into the room and sucks it dry. Quenches the fire. Removes the hope.
It has a noticeable direct effect on my attitude. I hate it.
It doesn't bother me when an unregenerate is cynical; could I expect anything more? I love countering their cynicism with my joy that is in Christ.
It drains me when the Christians around me are cynical. They are my brothers in Christ! Where is the edification? Where is the joy? Where is the peace? Where is the hope? Where is the love?
I have made the choice to avoid cynical Christians as best I can. They are hindering me from being everything I can be in Christ. They are quenching the Spirit. I will tell them that this is why they see less of me. If God grabs ahold of their heart, then I will come back and be graced by their company once again.
-Nate
I've identified the issue that has the most effect on my attitude. The cynicism around me. Sometimes I feel on top of the world, filled with the Spirit, motivated to press on for Jesus and love everyone I come in contact with. Then the cynic walks into the room and sucks it dry. Quenches the fire. Removes the hope.
It has a noticeable direct effect on my attitude. I hate it.
It doesn't bother me when an unregenerate is cynical; could I expect anything more? I love countering their cynicism with my joy that is in Christ.
It drains me when the Christians around me are cynical. They are my brothers in Christ! Where is the edification? Where is the joy? Where is the peace? Where is the hope? Where is the love?
I have made the choice to avoid cynical Christians as best I can. They are hindering me from being everything I can be in Christ. They are quenching the Spirit. I will tell them that this is why they see less of me. If God grabs ahold of their heart, then I will come back and be graced by their company once again.
-Nate
Saturday, February 19, 2011
Paralyzed
Sometimes we read stories of the Israelites in the Old Testament and pass judgment on them. God would show them his faithfulness and they would quickly forget it. Take, for instance, the story of their grumbling and complaining in the desert. Did you forget already that I led you out of captivity, that I parted the sea? Reading this story with the benefit of hindsight makes us look down on the Israelites, but aren’t we the same?
How quickly I forget the Lord’s faithfulness.
Thursday night I came to the Lord in prayer. I laid my worries, cares, and anxieties down at his feet. I poured it all out; it took and hour and a half. As a result, I was filled with the peace of God that transcends all understanding.
How quickly I forget, like an Israelite. Yesterday and today, I have been consumed with worry and anxiety. It’s almost paralyzing. I haven’t been able to get my work done because of it.
“We say, Israel, how could you forget after only 30 days? Come on!”
30 days? I forgot after 1 day.
Then the Lord reminded me. Gently.
“The Lord is near. Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” Philippians 4:5b-7
This is one of God’s most beautiful promises. Why can’t I remember it everyday?
How quickly I forget the Lord’s faithfulness.
Thursday night I came to the Lord in prayer. I laid my worries, cares, and anxieties down at his feet. I poured it all out; it took and hour and a half. As a result, I was filled with the peace of God that transcends all understanding.
How quickly I forget, like an Israelite. Yesterday and today, I have been consumed with worry and anxiety. It’s almost paralyzing. I haven’t been able to get my work done because of it.
“We say, Israel, how could you forget after only 30 days? Come on!”
30 days? I forgot after 1 day.
Then the Lord reminded me. Gently.
“The Lord is near. Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” Philippians 4:5b-7
This is one of God’s most beautiful promises. Why can’t I remember it everyday?
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