Thursday night I couldn't sleep. That hasn't happened to me in a long time and it was odd. My mind was racing. I just couldn't get over how blessed I am. Not because of my possessions, though God clothes me and feeds me (a blessing not to be overlooked). I am so blessed because of the people in my life. I am blessed because God put them there and I don't deserve it. I have the best parents ever. I have the best friends I could ask for. And I have two guys that I love very much and get to disciple.
These are my thoughts:
God, how is this real?
How could you love me this much?
As the wayward son who has returned to you, I just wish to be your lowly servant.
Just to be your slave and be treated as one.
Even this would be merciful.
I don’t even deserve to be your slave. I am dirt.
I am a terrible person.
But what is this, God?
How could you make me your son after all I’ve been?
How could you love me this much?
I deserve death but you give me joy.
I am a sinner but you choose to use me anyway.
I don’t know what to do but say thank you.
Every time I talk to you I hardly say anything else.
